Misfit Entrepreneur March 2023 - 347: Lead Yourself First, Lessons from Former Pro-Athlete Turned Bull Rider and 3-Tour Military Veteran, Wylie McGraw

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Dave Lukas Chats with Wylie McGraw

347: Lead Yourself First, Lessons from Former Pro-Athlete Turned Bull Rider and 3-Tour Military Veteran, Wylie McGraw

This week’s Misfit Entrepreneur is Wylie McGraw. Wylie is a former professional baseball player, competitive bull rider, 3-tour combat veteran, founder of Radical Performance Acceleration, and host of the hit podcast Wise Words & Whiskey. Wylie works with the world’s highest caliber founders and leaders from Fortune 500 CEO’s to Pro Athletes helping them breakthrough and remove their inner demons to help them find deeper meaning, true motivation, and make their impact.

Wylie brings a no-nonsense, navy seal style approach that gets results and then some and I’ve excited to have him on to talk everything entrepreneurship and how his methods work.

www.WylieMcGraw.com

Podcast: Wise Words and Whisky

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Show Notes

Wylie grew up in a household of athletes and high performance. He grew up around pro-athletes and California Angels pitching staff because of his dad and was recognized at a young age for having a great arm. They started to cultivate him, and his focus became sport. He loved it. As he got older, he started put the pieces together of how much of a business the sport was and the stressed brought on by it – he started to rebel and push away. He sought other outlets and different friends to challenge himself. As he got into high school, he became friends with a group of rodeo cowboys. He jumped in feet first and found he really connected with it and loved it. It unleashed the wild side that he had and how to conquer fear and use it as a catalyst for higher performance.

The next evolution for Wylie was the US military. It was an environment to continue pushing his limits. His time in the military helped to understand what it takes to push people and help them find their true self.

You say “leaders call you when they want their life back.” Explain that.

Wylie realized that we have transition moments and periods in our lives.
In those moments of change and discomfort that Wylie realized he had gift. He was the one that people came to expose the darker sides of their lives and would leave him and the discussion being better off.
After he came out of the military, he knew that he could use this to help people in a much bigger way.
He could push people, but give them to love, care, and find their path to being truly fulfilled.
He started with combat veterans and through world of mouth was introduced to others that needed support and help.
He found that many people that had done a lot of work on themselves still were not where they wanted to be.
Many people insulate their stress and pain, but don’t eradicate it. This is why people call him.

With all the work you have done, what have you found is typically the biggest obstacle to people reaching their potential and why?

Human beings are good at masking what is truly happening internally for them.
Our mind is the biggest liar that we face, but our bodies – we at the core know the truth.
Our minds lie to us about the truth and we tell ourselves the lie over and over compounding.
And when we get to a point later in life, where we have had success and done great things, we personally feel unsatisfied and unfulfilled. We chalk that to the cost of being human and that’s the way it is – that’s BS.
Because of this many are disconnected from their own truth.
We do things we know we shouldn’t be doing anyway – why? The people at the top are the biggest culprits of that because they have the means to do so. And as such, they need the most help live their truly best life.

What is the process you take people through on how to overcome this?

It starts with the moment they meet Wylie.
We are dynamic beings with many different facets.
When we try to approach growth and personal development, we do compartmentalized – trying to find a “step by step” process and that simply doesn’t work since everyone is drastically different.
The real magic is in the nuance of working specifically on themselves through not hiding the truth inside them. This is Wylie’s gift to see this and pull it out of people.
The real breakthroughs happen through an intimate understanding that is addressed head on.
Once this happens, then an individual has to recalibrate and do the work.
Fear is part of the transformation and is needed as part of the development.

3 tours in war zones, talk to us about your experience as a soldier and leader. What did you learn about to overcome immense challenges and limits?

Combat will stretch you. The only other thing close is the wars we fight within ourselves.
Every man in Wylie’s family served, so it was a time honored tradition, but Wylie was after the structure, discipline, and time honored commitment to excellence.
You are pushed mentally, physically, and spiritually to the absolute brink and break you down. You are then built back up and are better for it. You can keep calm in chaos naturally.
Kosovo taught him how to be still, focused, and grounded. It was the first place he got shot at and experienced combat.
He came back and was in the process of going to Ranger school when 9/11 happened and he was one of the first groups to go into Afghanistan.
He then went into Iraq which was a different type of combat being in close quarter and in cities.
All of this helped him in seeing his limits and go through them and overcome fear after fear and break free from any chains that had bound him. It helped him create a real, intimate relationship with himself, shed his demons and live truthfully with himself.

At the 30 min mark, Wylie talks about confronting ourselves.

We don’t want to face ourselves which is why many times top athletes and high performers essentially hire “yes men” and surround themselves insulating the lie.
People are scared of what they need to face in themselves and get exposed.
Instead of just admitting it and going to work, we make excuses to stay where we are and feed their demons.
This gets reinforced by society.

What are your top lessons from your leadership experience, you feel can help entrepreneurs the most?

Being a leader is about service outside of yourself.
You first have to lead yourself to lead others.
It is about standards, value, and habits, but it goes beyond that to do the work to master who you are.
Admit that you have been lying to yourself about a number of things and decide to confront these things head on – you’ll be amazed at how fast things will change if you do. Lead yourself first.

What are lessons you learned from your baseball and rodeo days that translate well to entrepreneurship?

We are always going to experience moments where we are not motivated and hit our limitations.
This is where we need to become more self-aware and realize you are struggling and being stretched. This is good and if you push through these times, you will get to a new level.
You have to learn how surrender your rigid thinking – you have the capacity and the ability. Don’t let your mind limit your body.
In bull riding, you cannot fight the bull, you need to relax and literally become one with the bull and it’s movement.
When something is really uncomfortable on your path to personal growth, surrender because that is what you really need.

Wise Words and Whisky, what’s your favorite label?

Balvenie and Doublewood neat.

Best Quote

Human beings are good at masking what is truly happening internally for them. Our mind is the biggest liar that we face.

You have to be willing to admit to yourself the biggest lie you have been telling yourself and confront it. Live in truth.

It is time to welcome necessary suffering. Suffering is important for growth.

Find comfort in the ambiguity of live and in fear. It is an ally for your personal growth and development.

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