How bad do you want it? How bad do you want to achieve your goal or goals? Do you wake up every day energized and determined to make it? Do have a burning fire inside you that will not let you stop or quit - almost like an obsession of reaching the levels you aspire to?
If you do, you have what you need to reach your goals. The #1 thing that determines whether you will reach your goals is the deep burning desire to reach them. A desire so strong that nothing can quelch it. It is desire that drives you and moves you every day to keep going not stopping until you have achieved the goals you want. But, how do you get "desire?" Can it be coached? Is it something you just have to have? It's really a little bit of both. Coaching desire is really helping someone or yourself fully understand what you want and gain clarity around it. But, the other piece is that once you are clear on what you want - you cannot stop thinking about what you need to do to get it. You cannot stop working at it and finding ways to make it a reality. You innovate and work through problems. You use adversity to your favor to fuel the fire to reach the goal even more. You have to want it and want it bad. As noted above, in some ways, it becomes an obsession - albeit a healthy one. If you've ever read Think and Grow Rich by Napolean Hill, he states that the secret of the book is right there for you throughout the book. That secret is to have a "burning desire" for something. If you have a true burning desire, you cannot help but go after what you want. And you will know it if you don't, because you won't wake up each day thinking of every way possible to get it. What is it you really truly want? Think deep and hard on it. What is the thing that sticks in the back of your mind more than anything else? Better yet, what is it that you know you should be doing and maybe are too scared to step out of the comfort zone and do - but you can't stop thinking about? Figure it out, follow your desire to get it and let it take you to whole new possibilities.
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Mental toughness is critical to success. It plays a role in all areas of our lives. But, what does it mean to be "mentally tough?" And how do you know that you are building mental toughness in your life?
Over the years, I have found that there are 6 signs that someone is mentally tough. Here they are and more importantly, here's you can foster them in your life. They Ask "How?" Mentally tough people don't let setbacks, obstacles, or being told "no" get in their way. Instead, they ask "How?" How can something be done? How can the desired result be achieved? By asking "How?" this activates the part of the brain that starts you thinking and looking for other ways to solve a problem...it spurs innovation and creation. The next time you find yourself thinking something cannot be done, ask "How can it be done?" and then start to put your ideas down. You'll find the solution may be right in front of you. They Understand Logic vs Emotion 99% of people make decisions or react to the things that happen in their lives with emotion. They have emotional responses to just about everything. There is a time and place for emotion, but it can also get your into trouble. Everyone has had a time (or many times) in their life where they reacted out emotion and regretted it later. The mentally tough understand when to seperate emotion and logic and use logic to to help overcome challenges and achieve their goals. For example, maybe there is a time where you gave up on something in your life. I bet if you looked back on it, it was emotion that drove the decision. You may have gotten to a point where "you just could not take it anymore" and you gave in. That is emotion. And every one has those moments, including the mentally tough. The difference is, the mentally tough recognize the emotion in the moment and separate it out. They then look at the situation logically and see how best to manage it based on what they can control, not focusing on what they cannot. They take action and work through - but don't give in unless the logic bears out that it is a fruitless effort. How can you better separate emotion and logic at key moments in your life? They are Humble, But Believe in Themselves The mentally tough may sometimes seem to be arrogant or have a higher opinion of themselves. The truth is that they are humble, but they have taken the time to "know thyself" and who they are and believe in themselves, their capabilities, and their potential. And they have built their mental strength up so that what others say or think does not bother them. Most of the time, they have a quiet confidence as they work toward what they want. There is nothing wrong with believing in yourself and charting your own path where others do not think is possible - just make sure to stay humble and be true. They Keep Going in Spite of Fear It may be surprising to note that the mentally tough get scared just like anyone else. They question things and have fear come into their lives. But, it should not be surprising that they have the mental fortitude to keep going in spite of the fear, the worry, and the doubts. This is where they separate emotion and logic the most. They recognize the emotional response of fear, but use their logic to work methodically through it and push forward through the fear. The next time you find yourself feeling fear, doubt, or worry - stop and ask yourself "What action can I take now that will help me in getting past this?" Then do it. They Stand Strong in the Face of Real Adversity True adversity is different than fear. Fear can come and go on a whim, but real adversity stares in you in the face and can seem insumountable. It takes a lot to overcome real adversity. Storming the beaches of Normandy and defeating the German army on D-Day was real adversity. It took the will to keep going and find a way or make one. The mentally tough do the same. They find the will to keep going in the toughest times in their lives. They will not let themslves give in or give up in the pursuit of their goals and what they want. What is the biggest adversity you face in your life right now? Are you shying away from it and taking it head on and working to overcome it? I can promise that if you choose to take it on and keep going until you get through it, you will be a better stronger person for it. They are Extremely Disciplined Mentally stong people are extremely disciplined in their lives and they use the discipline and structure they have created to help them stay mentally strong. In fact, being disciplined gives them the consistency in their day to be more effective and action oriented. It also helps to keep them on the path to success. Additionally, because for many, part of the structure is devoted to their health, it helps to keep them in their best shape physically and mentally to stay at their best. Do you have discipline and structure in your life? Do you hit the ground running each day knowing exactly what you need to do an accomplish for the day or do you find yourself going through days more aimlessly and distracted? In order to be your best, you must be productive. In order to do that, you must have discipline. If you are looking to improve your mental toughness, take the time start incorporating these 6 traits into your life and before long, you will see the difference they can make. I came across this excellent compilation of top entrepreneurs giving them best advice to succeed as an entrepreneur. There is more wisdom in this short 20 min video than you'll get in more MBA classes! Enjoy! I love great business stories. They teach us so much. From how entrepreneurs come up with their ideas to the ingenuity to make the business go - a great business story can teach us a lot and help us on our entrepreneurial journey. Recently, I came across a Twitter post that went through the story of YETI, the cooler brand, that took a commodity and turned it into a luxury, status symbol.
The post by @chrishlad and goes through the story of how the founders got sick of rigging flimsy coolers to stand on while fishing and decided to change the game. And they did so by not competing in the red ocean of the cheap cooler sellers in the big box stores, but by creating a whole new vertical at the top end of the industry. And they changed the game with the target audience they went after and how they marketed it. You can read the full story and post here These are my 3 most important takaways...
What lessons do you take from the YETI story and how can you apply them in your business? 21 days. It's not a long time. In fact, 21 days go by in the blink of an eye. But what can be accomplished in 21 days is incredible. In fact, 21 days of dedication is all that is needed to change your life. Studies have shown that is takes 21 days to create a habit. Think about that. If you want to make a change, whether it is your health, something in business, or in just in life, you can be on your way in just about 3 weeks. That's exciting!
There are some keys to ensuring success if you decide to either change or create a new habit in your life. First, you must commit to it. For example, if you want to start the habit of excercising for 45 minutes every day, you must commit to it and be deliberate in your approach. Second, write down what you are going to do. So, if the goal is 45 minutes per day of exercise, write it down and make a 21 day checklist to check off that you did it each day. What gets measured, gets managed. Third, be consistent. It is a lot easier to practice the new habit over 21 days if you are consistent in your approach. Staying with the example of exercising 45 minutes per day, strive to do the 45 minutes at the same time every day, so it is built into your schedule and the time is set aside. It will make it easier to plan for it as well. Fourth, be accountable. It is easier to accomplish your goal if you are accountable to it. The best way to be accountable is to have an accountability partner - someone that will help you keep on track for your goal. This may be someone who is building the same habit with you or someone close to you that is not afraid to call you out. Fifth, reward yourself. Building a habit means change and a lot of dedicated, consistent work for a short time, 21 days. But that doesn't mean it isn't hard. And to help keep you motivated, you should decide on a reward that is important to you, that you will give yourself for accomplishing to goal. Keep your reward top of mind, especially in those moments where you don't want to keep going or consider skipping the work toward the habit for a day. It will help you in the moment. Good habits are the cornerstone of success and the best part is we get to choose them and put them in our lives. Just think where you will be a year from now if you took 21 days each month to build a new habit to help you in your life. That's 12 new habits. Would your life change? You bet it would. So get started and here's to your success! This week marks the 300th episode of the Misfit Entrepreneur! When I started the podcast, I was excited just to do it for my daughter as a passion project. I never expected that I'd be sitting here at 300 episodes writing to all of you who support the show in over 150 countries. I am so grateful for you and want to thank you for all of your support and feedback over the years. 300 episodes is big milestone and it would not be possible without you.
I am also excited because the 300th episode is a Lesson for Hannah episode where I speak directly to my daughter giving her lessons to help her in life. I hope you have been able to take a lot from these episodes as well. As move on to the next 300 episodes, we will continue to find the best entrepreneurs in their fields and share their best wisdom and success habits with you, but we will also be looking at expanding the impact of the show and doing more with you. So, stay tuned and again, thank you for all of your support! Dave Having interviewed hundreds of the most succesful entrepreneurs in the world, you start to notice patterns over time - consistencies across these highly successful people. There are more than you think. Things like be highly organized and structured, taking care of their health, focusing on the most important things that they are best at, committing to continued personal growth, etc. are just a few of these consistencies.
But, there is one thing the highly successful do that is often overlooked. They schedule time to "think" each week. That's right, they make sure to set time aside to "exercise" their mind outside of the day to day where they think and let that thinking show them opportunities and answers in their lives and businesses. There are a lot of different processes that these people use and in many ways, it is personal to them, and should be personal to you, but at the very least, you should set aside 30-45 minutes once per week to think. You should find a comfortable place, outside of your normal work environment. During these times, you should let your mind wander and use a journal to take down unique insights or thoughts that come through. You should ask yourself key questions and think through current challenges and write down potential answers to them. You should also create some action items from each session. As stated earlier, the process for each person is different, but if you can get into the habit of thinking at least once per week and design a structure that works for you - it will go a long way in helping your success. Make time to think! No matter what you do in life and business, you will not succeed without the help of great mentors along the way. Many times we have mentors in our lives without even realizing it. They can come in the form of a teacher who spends extra time making sure you understand the material so you can get a better grade, or maybe in the form of a great coach in sports. Mentors come in all different ways.
And at times during our lives, we must seek out mentors to guide us and help us to level up. But, what makes a great mentor? I have been blessed with many great mentors over the years and as I have looked back on them, I have noticed 5 traits consistent across all of them. They are Wise Good mentors are wise. Now, this may seem like a given as you seek out a mentor for guidance. But, what is wisdom? Wisdom is not just being smart. Wisdom is true experience. It can only be found by being in the trenches and having gone through the ups and downs and everything in-between in the area of life you are looking for their help. Great mentors are not just smart, but experienced and wise in practical ways because they have been there and been through it. When looking for a mentor in an area of your life, make sure to look for someone who has "been there and done that" and gained true wisdom in doing so. They Hold You Accountable Mentors hold you accountable and discipline you when needed. They are not afraid call you out or disagree with you. They keep you disciplined and focused when needed. In fact, you will know that you have a mentor that truly cares if they are willing to hold you accountable and impart discipline into your life. In this area, in some ways, they are like a parent who is raising a child. A parent who cares will hold their child accountable and discipline them as needed to help them learn and grow in the right way. I've often told those that I coach, it is when I stop challenging you or holding you accountable is when you need to worry, because that means I don't care anymore. Find a mentor that cares and embrace them holding you accountable. They Challenge You In Ways You Don't Expect Another thing that good mentors do is challenge you in different ways - unexpected ones. They do this because they see the things you don't see, blind spots, and they help bring them to light. A good mentor will help you work on the areas that you are not good at as well as fostering the ones you have talent. They have an ability to see the whole picture and help put it together in the best way. They are not afraid to tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear, and then help you in your development. They Help You Live Into Your Potential As discussed above. good mentors can see the bigger picture and potential blind spots. In doing this, they can help you live into your potential. In fact, they can help you realize your true potential and that you are capable of much more than you realize. They not only help you understand this, but more importantly, they help you to take the actions to make it a reality. This is one of the most exciting parts of working with a great mentor, finding out what you are truly capable of. They Make Time For You Mentors are usually successful people in demand or have pursuits that keep them pretty busy. Another sign of a great mentor is that no matter how busy they are, they seem to find time for you, especially when you need them most. This trait is rare in today's world. To find someone that will set aside everything they have in their life and on their plate to help another person is a blessing. And great mentors do this consistently. When you find a great mentor, you will see this from them and be truly grateful for it. One last note is that some mentors will ask to be compensated for their time. There is NO problem with this. Their time is precious and comes at an opportunity cost to other things in their life. And they do have to pay their bills as well. If you have a found mentor that checks all the boxes above and wants compensated, don't rule them out. Work out a plan where they get compensated and as you find more success, they can share in that success by higher compensation. This may come in the form of sharing in the future success of your business in some way or a graduated system of compensation. You'll have to figure it out, but just know that it is worth it and will pay off multiple times over for you. One of the most important, if not most important things you can do for your success in all areas of life is to master your "inner game." Your inner game directly controls your outer game.
But, what is the inner game? Your inner game is simply is the way you think. The way you think about yourself, life, success, business, relationships - everything. And everything begins with what you believe. I have developed an acronym for how the process of the inner game works in our lives. It is as follows: B->E->T->A->R Your Beliefs lead to your Emotions, you Emotions lead to your Thoughts, your Thoughts lead to your Actions, and your Actions lead to your Results. If you take out everything in the middle and look at the first and last work, you get Beliefs = Results. Most people don't know that much of what we believe was not chosen by us. It was put there through many years of conditioning. Think about it. You come out of the womb with a clean slate. It is the influences and experiences of your life that help to shape what you believe and ultimately how you think. These influences are things like parents, school, friends, media, culture, religion, etc. And much of what we pick up is good and helpful for our lives, but many of us pick up some adverse beliefs and thought patterns along the way as well. And these can hold us back from reaching out true potential - many times without us evening knowing it! Why? Because of the subconscious mind. It is the part of brain that operates without us even having to think about it. It is the most powerful part of our brain and runs us almost on autopilot. It has created responses, thought patterns, and reactions to just about every situation we encounter in life and every time one of these situations presents itself, it reacts - we react without even thinking consciously. This happens over and over again throughout each day. How much do you actually "think" to drive a car or answer a question? You don't, you just do it. This is the subconscious conditioning, your inner game at work. Once you realize this, your next question is probably, "What can I do to create the automatic responses I want to have? " That is THE question. And the answer is simpler than you would think. You can change your conditioning by changing your thoughts - your beliefs. Now, I did not say it was easy and did not involve a lot or work - in reality it is work you will do the rest of the your life. But, the secret is to start recognizing your automatic reactions and start choosing if you want to keep them or change them. For example, if you are someone who has a short temper, you can recognize when your emotions are welling up. You know when that feeling of anger or frustration is bubbling up inside you. The next time it happens, just stop, ask, and choose. Stop before you react. Ask yourself if the reaction you are having is the one you want to have. Then choose how you will move forward and change the internal belief you have about being angry in that situation. Admittedly, this is very awkward at first, but once you've done it a number of times, it get easier and more automatic. Learning to live from true choice of the beliefs that you want to have will free you and give you better control over you emotions ultimately leading to better results in your life - the results you choose to have. There a couple more important things to understand about this process. The first is that it doesn't work if you see yourself as perpetual victim. You must be willing to take responsibility for your life and choices. Doing this also gives you control over your life. Second, and this wisdom has been passed down through generations, it's even in the Bible. What your believe becomes your reality. In the Bible, it is stated, "That which you gaze upon, you become." You can understand this. What you focus on, expands in your life and in your subconscious automatic responses. If you are are always focused on the negative, guess what, you will attract and subconsciously bring more negativity into your life and train your subconscious to look for it. Conversely, if you are focused on growing yourself and working toward your goals, your subconscious will drive you there. Lastly, back to choice and choosing things. You get to choose your attitude every day. Your attitude is how you approach the world. If you don't choose it, your subconscious will revert to whatever default programming it has created your entire life. Each day, wake up and spend 2 minutes deciding your attitude and who you will be in the world that day. Set your intentions. Train your subconscious that you are in control and set the tone of your inner game. If you can learn to change your beliefs, focus on the right things in your life and choose your attitude and how you react to the situations of life, you will find that you can change your whole world and maybe THE world. So, get going and choose your way forward! Good things come to those who wait. But, who has time to wait anymore? I say that as a joke, but it's true right? More and more, it seems that we have very little to no patience. We have been conditioned to expect instant results and most of the time we get them. So, I can't blame people for having little patience these days.
With that said, patience is a lost art in today's world - but those that come back to it an practice it reap great benefits. For example, I recently wrote an article about questioning a business growth strategy that had worked for a long time, but had recently faltered. The article was about how the strategy had worked for years and had issues over the course of about 6 weeks or so and I found myself wondering if I should abandon it. After some diligence and stepping back, I realized that the market for the strategy had acted out of character and now it has come back in line. I had the patience to stay with the strategy and now it is beginning to pay off again. I literally was worried about a 6-week blip out of many years of success! But that is what we have been conditioned to do. If something doesn't work, many times right away, we abandon it. We can't wait for a browser to load slowly for the for the microwave to finish. But, if we can have patience and perspective and are willing to play the long game, we will be much more successful. I've seen this time and time again with guests on the Misfit Entrepreneur - those that play the long game win. In fact, many times they didn't have the best business or solution, they just outlasted everyone else to become the one on top. Keep this lesson in mind next time you find yourself losing patience - especially with something proven to be successful. Give it the patience and time it's due and commit to playing the long game and it will pay off for you! |
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